Dec 24 1865
Southern white folk unite together to form a service organization wherein they consort with other southern whitefolk. Members participate in festive cruciform fire ceremonies and lively negro butcherings. By the 1920’s membership in the Ku Klux Klan reaches an astonishing 2 million.
Dec 24 1954
Rock musician Johnny Ace plays a little .45 calibre solitaire (Russian Roulette) at City Auditorium in Houston after a concert. Blammo. He thought it would impress his girlfriend, perhaps it did.
Dec 24 1985
Fidel Castro announces that he has given up cigars.
Dec 24 1989
Panamanian dictator Manuel Noriega seeks asylum at the Papal Nunciature. American troops try blasting him with rock music and the sounds of rabbits being slaughtered, but he takes two weeks to emerge. The isthmus groundhog does not see his shadow and is taken by the US Army to Florida lockup where he still resides.
Dec 24 1997
It is revealed that actor Woody Allen (age 62) was married to his adopted daughter Soon-Yi Previn (age 27) in Venice, Italy yesterday. She becomes her own stepmother, and Woody his own neurotic son in law.
Dec 24 1997
Disgruntled (former) postal worker David Lee Jackson takes seven hostages at a Denver mail sorting facility. He holds them for over nine hours before surrendering to police. Jackson had been fired 18 months previously for threatening his superior.